A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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The holocaust

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How many vikings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Probably just one, though I'd imagine it hard to teach someone from the 9th century C.E. how to, let alone explain electricity.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Watch me shoot you

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think twice or at least think

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Why did the boy loose his glass with milk? He got hit by a bus.

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what do you call a black drug dealer? A pharmacist.

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What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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You know who else sucks dick? My aunt Jane. She was forced to become a prostitute after she got fired from her job.

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What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

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2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

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Who is John Galt?

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You know what's funny? A well told joke

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Because she was a very poor worker.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to commit suicide.

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Whats brown and sticky? A Stick.

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WNBA

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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Knock Knock Who's there??? Your mom

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Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Well I would open the freezer.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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