Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

thumb_up thumb_down -34

They see me trollin' They hatin'...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did the lawyer name his daughter. he couldnt because both the baby and his wife died in child birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's short, ruthless, and asian? Kim Jong Ill

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why is the Asian 2nd grader sad? Her best friend was diagnosed with breast cancer. She has 3 weeks to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

So a jew walks into a bar!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Hello, I'm Mark and I have multiple-personality disorder. Don't listen to him, no he doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

thumb_up thumb_down -36

-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Atheism

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops