How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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What is you problem!? Im retarded, what is your problem?

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

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Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive Umm, She's dead

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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I like touching my boobs

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Next up, Sharpi and Ryan take their audition faliure very seriously in "columbine high school musical"

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was a busy highway it was hit before making it to halfway.

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what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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