Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

Did you hear about the guy with five penises? Me neither, because that sounds like a very improbable aberration.

Why doesn't your dad want to have sex with your mom? Because my penis is already in her vagina, thus your dad's inability to place his penis in her vagina.

roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

What's worse than spending time with Inlaws? Spending time with outlaws.

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Easter? A: Diabetes

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

What do you get when you rape a dead baby filled with jalapeños? A lifetime in prison, and a burning penis.

There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

How do you kill a innocent young boy walking from school? I don't know but do you want to enjoy a refreshing beverage of creaming soda?

Why was six afraid of seven. It wasnt because numbers cant possible show emotions. I

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

Why didn't the cat eat its dinner? Because I nailed its head to the floor.

what does rain do? think of how happy its life was!

Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely and should probably go to the hospital.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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