How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

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How many blondes does it take to replace a light bulb? Well, it depends if the person is blond or not. Also the person's age, as kids may not understand this proses at all.

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What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications/programs, thus causing the game Jetman on Facebook to lag.

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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had one nut

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a man walks into a bar and quickly notices a young lady having a drink. He sits beside her and asks 'why the long face?' 'My mother was raped by a horse.'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt.

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Niggas be like you ugly and you playing hard to get, yo ass already hard to want!

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If chuck noris has five dollars and you have five dollars, he has more money than you. He forgot about the extra dollar in his back pocket

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Q: how do you stop a baby's crying keeping you up at night A: pull out it's wind pipe

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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Why did Alice cross the road? Because she wasn't funny. At all. So the people on the other side of the road asked her to do so.

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A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

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Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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What did Helen Keller say when she was hit by a bus? . : ; : . : . :

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Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

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Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says "I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here."

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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Forget about them, do not compare yourself to those beneath you, you always wanted to help as many as possible, in a world where everyone fights for themselves only.

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Ask me if I'mm a candy cane. Shutup, there are a lot of these types of jokes. Create your own you poophead.

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A man walked into a room and said to his friend, "I am about to show you something amazing." He claps twice and the lights turn on. He is using a device called The Clapper made by Joseph Enterprises, Inc. using advanced technology that was patented in 1985.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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