Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

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clamidia

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BUT HWY?

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

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'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

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What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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a. why? b. because I wanted

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why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

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how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

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You know what's funnier than 24? .... 9-11

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Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

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Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm afraid of toasters.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

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Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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