What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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Hi Adam,

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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Christians

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"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

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Four guys are on an airplane. The plane lands safely and the four guys return to their families.

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96

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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Knock knock

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What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

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Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven is a horrible pedophile and has deeply seeded emotional problems

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

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roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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