What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

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What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

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Why some people don't get the flu twice? Because they died!

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I'm currently on a seafood diet That is, I only eat seafood.

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A Jew, A priest and a Muslim go into a pub,put their differences aside and have a good time!

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

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Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy launched a flare. Nobody came.

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I'm getting sick of holocaust jokes can't you Nazi Anne Frankly I'm sick of it

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. You wife was killed in an accident.

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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What's worse than spending time with Inlaws? Spending time with outlaws.

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Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

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Continents are large islands.

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why did the shark bite the surf board? It thought it was turtle.

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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Why did the gorilla have big nostrils? Because it was a trait passed on to him from his biological father.

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Why did the deer cross the road? The overpopulation of man has caused an expansion of construction into the habitat of the deer and it has required him to occasionally frequent human populated areas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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