What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

what word starts with 'p' and ends in 'orn'? popcorn you sickos

Whats smells like a banana and is purple? A banana, I lied about the purple thing.

Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

If youre African, why are you white?

Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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