- Anti Joke

How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

HOLY COW!

Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

Should a pole bump an alarm?

(Guys I want to get the most likes so like my joke.) What did the person want. To get the most likes :)

Knock knock. Who's there? Screw! Screw who? Screw you.

Here's a riddle... A cowboy rides into town on saturday, stays for three days, and leaves on saturday... How does he do it? Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... OH... I'M DONE NOW...

If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Seeing as this situation is logically impossible considering that Adolf Hitler died in the year 1945 and Osama bin Laden was born in the year 1957, I would be in a room with just a black guy and two bullets. Then I would proceed not to shoot the black guy on the fact that I enjoy the talking and learning about cultural diversities between the black and white races.

What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

Whats Funnier than the Holacaust? A: Nothing you asshole!

once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

So a guy comes into a bar... And he is cited for public indecency.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

What is cowboy say

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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