Roses are red Violets are red My lawn is red My fences are red It appears my garden is on fire.

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how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno ask the chicken

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Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

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Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

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If youre African, why are you white?

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Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

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Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

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After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

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Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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What did the taxi friver say to the man? "You forgot your briefcase"

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

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What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

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what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

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What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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