A blind man walks into a bar After realising he might be hurt everybody rushes to his aid

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What's brown and sticky? A piece of toffee, which is brown and/or dark brown in color.

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A fish walks into a bar. He proceeds to talk the bartender. "Blub blub blub" The fish sitting next to him whispers to the bartender. "What is he talking about." The bartender shrugs.

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What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A victim of an alcohol related car accident

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how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

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What do you call double A's? Batteries

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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What do you get when you cross a lamb and a pigeon? You get your house taken away.

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How do you know when a ghost is lying? I don't know because I've never met one, so from personal experience I couldn't tell you.

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[Set up] [No punch line]

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What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

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Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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Matthew Baker

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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why did sally drown cause she was black

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A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

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Why is the young Chinese boy crying? Because he is being raped.

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A goose walks into a bar. Maybe he should have ducked.

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19 roosters walk into a roller coaster

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Why did the blind man itch his knee? He has cancer

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Why did the mexican cross the road? His drugs were on the other side.

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What do you call a dinosaur that doesn't lay eggs? A male dinosaur

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What is white, sticky, and something that gay people and women love? Frosting.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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