Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

Q: What did Mr. Spoke say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit does shit stick to your fur? The rabbit says no, so the bear wipes his ass on the rabbit

3 blind mice walk into a bar. they have no idea of their surroundings and are quickly crushed to death.

Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

An under aged girl walks into a bar. She couldn't have done so without a fake ID and early development.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

what is worse than losing your phone? having it destroyed because you were texting while driving causing an accident and you are not eligible for and upgrade for another two months.

silly rabbit trix are for kids and jews

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

what do you call a black lawyer? a very well educated black man

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

Whats worse than suicide? death

What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why did the boy get diagnosed with Cancer? I don't remember I have Alzheimers.

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

Women's rights

A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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