Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

thumb_up thumb_down +61

So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The white guy did it!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Who's fat? Holly Davis.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

hi

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops