asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

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There was porn on the Internet I masturbated to it, but my parents caught me, and I can't ever leave the house again until I'm 18.

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What does the fox say? A scream-y howl. A shrill, hoarse scream of anguish, it sounds more than anything like a human baby undergoing some kind of physical torture.

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What's the difference between Christians and Jews? The Holocaust. The Holocaust is the difference.

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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Why did the Mexican jump the American border? Because he wanted a better paying job to support his family, and legal immagration to the States is a lengthy and highly difficult process.

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guess what what that wasnt it

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Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

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What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

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Were you born on a freeway? because thats were all accidents happen.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

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Women's Rights

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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Why was the little girl crying? Her parents got divorced yesterday.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

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I've lost my electron!! Are you sure? Yes! I'm Positive!

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I got pissed off at my little brother... So I threw him out of the window.

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Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

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Lol... (wow you made me type lol), "like it is nothing to be ashamed of?" Your eyes are really beautiful, honestly probably the most beautiful eyes I have seen... And no, I am not talking about your bewbs.

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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