Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus Flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it could be like ambition.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's big and grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I'm sorry sally your grandmother is dead. LOL _ grandpa Laugh out loud!. I can't belive you. I thought it meant lots of love Grandpa-ha funny mistake though right?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If a small quiz is a quizicle then what is a small test? A quiz.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why didnt jimmy go to school? He had a hangover

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the two blonds go to the bar together? Because they were carpooling to save money and help save the earths ozone layer that seals in all of our oxygen. They were also meeting some friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you say to a rock? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a black police officer? The drug dealer's inside man.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

thumb_up thumb_down -7

one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's a lil plus a lot A little more then a lot

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

You know what is funnier than 24???? I don't know that's why I was asking

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Mahjdichdhsjxidjhsbxu shcowiqx own hdqu Hedgehog the third

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A grandma says come on twinkies and the teinkies say were terriosts from your lost hole

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why are there so many anti-jokes about refrigerators? Because the writer of the joke was pressured by terrorists that would kill him if he didn't write about refrigerators.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it wanted to. Why di the chicken cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the cow's face.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops