Jimmy has nine bags of sugar. He eats nine bags of sugar. What doeshe have now? Diabetes

what do you get when you see jonny cry-a monkey lol

What do you call a rich black person? A: Oprah

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

how does a a fat person dance? with his feet

Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

If i was a painting... Id hang myself

why did Sarah fall out of the swing? she had no arms. Knock knock. who's there? not Sarah.

What's the difference between a Lamborgini and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

What did one homo-sexual say to his four homo-sexual friends? Were One Direction!!

What can hitler cook well Steak

Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

What did the pregnant teen get for Christmas? A miscarriage

What do you call an arabic man who sells bombs for a living? A business man.

What's brown and sticky? Shit.

what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

numbers just make the funniest antijokes

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Female Orgasms

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Actually, violets are violet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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