Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

what did the girl get with her blueberry waffles? blue waffles.

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

What happened to the little boy who threw a spitball at the teacher? He was killed the next day when the teacher, who had a history of mental instability and schizophrenia, decided to go on a shooting rampage in class.

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

A black man, a white man, and an Asian man walk into a bar. The black man says, "My wife died in a terrible book-keeping accident.". The white man says, "My wife died in a terrible lightbulb-sorting accident.". The Asian says, "My wife died in a terrible geography accident.". Soon after, the bar was hit by a missile, promptly killing the three men.

why is the man laughing. he isn't, he's just been informed he has testicular cancer.

Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

What do you call a snooker cue that only hits stripes? Anything you want, it can't hear you.

So this guy filled with blood, right? This caused his veins to protrude and him to bleed strongly when he cut his wrists with razors later that night- because of his struggle with depression and substance abuse.

Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies nothing child abuse is not a funny matter.

Laughter is the best medicine. Not for cancer.

Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender then asks him "Why the long face?" The horse then gives the bartender an unwilling look as he walks to the other side of the bar where several people leave due to potential danger in the situation.

- Why did the man with the big pocket get arrested in Utah? - Because adultery is illegal in Utah.

Why did the cook put rubber bands in the spaghetti Because he was an asshole

Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

what is worse than losing your phone? having it destroyed because you were texting while driving causing an accident and you are not eligible for and upgrade for another two months.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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