If I have 12 backpacks and Jimmy has 91 pancakes, then how many marshmallows can cover the roof of this building? Purple. Because Aliens don't wear hats.

Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

Q: What's the difference between a black man from San Diego and a white man from Miami? A: They live in different cities, and in the presidential election, the black man voted for Obama and the white man voted for McCain

Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

were at work systems r down

A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

Why did the chicken contact Michael Jackson? To get to the other side.

What did the Elephant say the other Elephant? We do not know. Their vocalization is still a mystery to us.

Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

why was the carrot sad? it was stuck in an antelopes anus

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why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

what are three short words? i a am

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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