Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

Q. What's funnier than an anti-joke? A. Thousands of anti-jokes, compiled on a worldwide network.

Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

Obama 2012

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

What kind of cheese is not you cheese? Not your cheese.

a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

here kitty kitty

wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...