Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What does the composer Berg lack? Schoen.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I went to work Got paid, Then came home.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a black guy hates chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

-Ask me if I'm a tree. +Are you a tree? -Yes. -Ask me if I'm an orange. +Are you an orange? -No, I'm a tree, were you listening me?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

pee

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it wanted to. Why di the chicken cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the cow's face.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the curious black guy a good Lumberjack? He was always axin'.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red FACT violets are blue FACT this ryhm is boring how about you FACT

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did little Betsy have a stomach ache? Her alcoholic mother pinned her down in a drunken rage and made her drink bleach.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than the Holocaust? Very few things are worse than this international tragedy Over six million people died, most of them tortured before they died. But stepping on a thumb tack is way up there

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's white, black and can't fly? Nothing important.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did one homo-sexual say to his four homo-sexual friends? Were One Direction!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what's the difference between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops