Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

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What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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A BABY seal walks into a club

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops