What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

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What's worse than public speaking? Public masterbation. *Spelled it wrong purposly to bypass the filter*

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What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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Why would a woman be out of the kitchen? Because she is busy working, being outside, resting, or any other activity that does not include food.

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Q: why did the boy walk into the woods alone? A: nobody knows he hasn't come out yet

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Two people were playing Monopoly. One was a blonde and one was black. The blonde said, "your turn".

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Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

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Yo' mom is so fat, She should probably consider a low fat diet in which no more than 30% of the calories are from fat.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. You're dog is dead. And so is your family.

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What do you do to a little boy who just called you fat? Throw a rhino at him!

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How do you tell if your boyfriend is gay? He is having sex with men

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How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

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If life gives you lemons.... Life is an abstract noun not a physical object so it can not give you lemons.

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In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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Why Didnt John Return any of his calls he was in a very serious car accident fell into a coma and will probablly will not wake up ever again

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you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trash can 1 baby in 10 trash cans

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The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

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What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

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Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

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All these jokes are so much funnier when I read them during class, laughing my ass off and everybody's looking at me like I'm retarded

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What does karissas vagina taste like? Ask vantwon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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