A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

Two Muslim men board an American Airlines jet. Nobody feels threatened and engage in friendly conversations with the passengers. The aircraft explodes due to poorly manufactured engine parts made by small starving children.

Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

why did the titanic sink, it was hit by a iceberg

Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

A Jewish man with a 20 mile boner walks into a wall. Which body part hits the wall first? His nose

Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

What do you call a Jew A Jew

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

One time i was sitting down

A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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