What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

Richard fell off of a cliff. He can fly.

9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

The Colts this year.

Two Jews walk into a bar, and they were both served properly

how do you make a joke act like yourself

A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

Your moms so fat She should get some help because there's nothing good about being fat

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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