69.9

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i was molested.

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

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What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

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knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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what the hell happened to your face

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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A BABY seal walks into a club

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

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Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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