Where's the soap?

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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Caitlin Jenner has a mangina.

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Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

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What did the giraffe say to the walrus? Nothing. Giraffes can't talk. What did the Scotsman say to the walrus? Nothing. Scotsmen can't talk.

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Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

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What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

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what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? pretty much everything because dead babies aren't a laughing matter

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Rebecca Black

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What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

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Why did the baby fall out of the trees? Cause it was dead.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

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how does hitler drink soup ? with a spoon

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Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

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What is a light shade of beige? My bedroom wall.

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What group of people do the police target? Criminals.

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Why did the Girl fall of the swing? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's There? Not That Girl

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What do you call a dead baby in a lunchbox? It doesn't matter he won't hear you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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