roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? one dead baby nailed to ten trees

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A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

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I like touching my boobs

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If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

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scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

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Why did the boy have no ankles? Because his legs were amputated

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womens rights

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

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Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

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Tall asians

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Dear crush, I want to drink you

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

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Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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