Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? its a refridgerator Why did the third monkey jump out of the tree It thought it was a game

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A rooster is sitting on the top of a house. It lays an egg. Which way does it roll? This can be solved by using the dimensions and angles of the roof to find the most probable direction it would roll (Incorporating in the power of gravity of course). Of course if the egg from the roosters uteris came out in an akward or unlikely way, it could roll the other way.This can be factored in very quickly because with the video evidence of the rooster having the egg you can see how it was delivered(the video is not of which way it rolls, just of the delivery).

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What has the exact same colors as the gay flag but are sometimes hilarious? A: Clowns.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red Violets are blue I want to have sex But no one else wants to

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When life gives you lemons....you probably just FOUND lemons...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? *snicker* F*ck a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

roses are red pickles are green i like your legs and whats in between

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I'm an old man with Alzheimer's. Ok I'm going to tell you a little story. Well i was walking down the road bout 36 sum odd years ago and the next thing i knew i was........... Hmmm.... i wonder whats in the fridge...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red violets are blue I have outsimers Wait what?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was there a black man and a white man in a bar? Due to the probability of this occurance happening due to percentages of black/white people in a bar, this specific situation should be of no shock, in fact it is a completely normal occurance one of which should not be questioned

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what is better than your entire family getting brutally murdered applesauce

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

An African american man fell out of a boat at sea. He swam back to the boat.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Im gay What about you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

German bedtime story: There once was a boy who liked to suck his thumbs. His mother told him to stop, but he wouldn't. So she cut of his thumbs. Now he has none. Goodnight.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do an eagle and a off-white light bulb have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's funnier than 9/11? Nothing. 9/11 wasn't funny. It was a terrible tragedy, the most tragic in U.S. history. If you think that is funny you are a sick person. By: Logan in South Dakota

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many Jews do you have to kill in order to make a museum? 6 Million.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you kill a retard? you shoot him in the head

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops