a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

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A Jewish person had a robber in their house. Who broke in? Adolf Hitler

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

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what did the old lady die of old age...

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the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

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A dog walks into a bar, the dog is assisting his blind owner

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

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What is big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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A man walks into a bar wearing large and baggy pants. The bartender asks him, "Why the large, baggy pants?" The man replies, "Because they're comfortable."

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24... wait i thought of something better than 24... let me hear it... 25!!!!

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That awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it would.

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Why did this website get run into the dirt? Because you they let idiots like me post whatever I want. _CamelJocky

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What's similar between a yellow bicycle and blue potatoes? They both have weight.

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Why did Jimmy fall out of the tree. Cause' I shot him.

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I drive a 'rarri

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Why was timmy having trouble with his homework? Because lobotomies were a forced practice in the 1950's.

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i googled who gives a fuck my name wasn't in the results

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i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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