A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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Why did the lorry cross the road? It was swerving to avoid a small child. Unfortunately the driver's reactions were too slow and he hit the kid. After a week fighting for their life in hospital the child fibaly died. There wasn't a scratch on the lorry though.

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here's a chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris is 5'10 and lost to bruce lee!

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Q. What do you get when you cross the North Korean border and an American? A. Death.

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Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? He was furious because it was the fourth time that week that it failed to wake him up for school, and he was going to be late again.

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What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

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Why didn't junior say thank you for his christmas present from his dad? He was raised by two moms

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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everyone lies especially if they said agree to terms of service

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What's yellow and talks? A talking giraffe.

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Why did the black homosexual blind man want to go to the comedy club? He enjoys a good laugh

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woman's rights

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

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Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

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adam hodgson !

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Dr Dr I think I have diarrhea You have irritable bowel syndrome, I recommend IBS support

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Did you hear about the woman that died of a heart attack? More oxygen for us!

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A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

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Osama bin Laden walks into a bar. Just joking, he's dead.

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Q: Why Did The Family Eat Olive Garden For Dinner A: Because it was a simple way to please everyone but letting them choose their own meal

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You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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