Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple

What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas ? A treadmill

Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I am a dog.

Jack and jill went up a hill to get some water. Jack fell down, twisted his ankle, and continued to roll. He broke his spine and collar bone and he was later taken to the hospital. Later that night he died because the doctors couldn't do anything. Jill then killed herself in mourning.

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

A: Did you know Helen Keller had a treehouse? B: No. A: Neither did she.

how do you call a big red creature eating rocks? the big red rock eating creature.

Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

why was the old man on the ground he fell

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

why is pie good. because it just is.

Asians.

Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

The Oakland Raiders

You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

800 people died last year. end of story

What's the difference between girl scouts and boy scouts? Girl scouts are usually females and boy scouts are usually males.

What do you call two grown Mexican men playing tennis? Two adults showcasing their talent in a friendly game of tennis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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