3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

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Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

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Two mice fell into a bucket of cream. They both promptly drowned.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? Impaired of vision.

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whats worse than a baby in a bathtub? its dead. Whats worse than that? its in a clown suit. Whats worse than that? The baby had down syndrome.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A watermelon doesn't scream when you cut it open.

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what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

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An American, a French man, and Jew were all in an airplane about to skydive. Their skydiving instructor comes out and says, "I'm sorry, there seems to've been a mistake and we only have two parachutes." The company refunds them, and they, while reasonably disappointed, agree to reschedule the lesson.

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Husband: Take the f out of way. Wife: There's no f in way! Husband: You just swore

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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A woman wearing a very fancy, striped sweater walks into a bar and sits down. The bar tender asks her “what’ll it be”?. The girl replies “Just a beer for me”. As this happens a child in Africa dies from complications due to starvation.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender was incredibly biased towards religion and had the rabbi removed.

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John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

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what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

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I mustache you a question. But I'll shave it for later.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense Microwave

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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