Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and so am I

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A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

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OH MY LUMPIN GOD!

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? a bike

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How many dead bodies does it take to fill up a bathtub? Wellll.......... It depends on how big the bathtub is.

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The only difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is the taste.

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What did david give back? Nothing.

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A black man got sentenced go prison for stealing a car. He didn't do it.

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9/11.

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Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

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Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says "I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here."

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why did the monkey buy a shoe? to put em on!!!!

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Why is Evan short? He was born that way.

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Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

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~Chinese Anti Joke~ What is the difference between American army and Chinese army? American army teach youngsters to use their tanks. Chinese army smash youngsters with their tanks.

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Mini mouse was brutally killed n Oakland Now Mickey is a Chinese member of the crips in Compton Remember don't forget to see the new Disney movie, Mickey Goes Gang-Bangin

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

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Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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Why was the youtube like bar green? Because the graphics designer felt like making it green. =.=

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's the difference between Jordan and Time? Time passes!!

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In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

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Praise Paisley

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knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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