what did the man say after he fell off the cliff nothing, he's dead

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Water? I hardly know her.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

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whats worse than having that Holocaust joke be the best anti-joke for months? Windows updates

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What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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What did the vegetarian order for lunch? A dead baby.

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Black Ops? That sounds illegal. Anyway, what do you mean you are a employee only? I mean if you where a fed, you would either be on the top, or be an employee no?

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Who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? The same Griffin Kid.

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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how many baby's does it take to clean paint your house red. depends on the quality of the crusher.

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Q: Why do black people like fried chicken? A: Because it tastes delicious!

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Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's rich...

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What's the opposite of a joke? An Anti-Joke.

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What do you call a dead child? The product of a car crash

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Knock, knock. Who's There? The Fire Department...

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A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

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What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

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How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

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Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

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What did the serial killer do when his check bounced? He promptly deposited more money into his account.

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests Testicals

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What do you get when you cross an African, a white person, an Asian and a Spaniard? Society's worst nightmare

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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