a man goes for blood check up ..........his whole hand was frozen >>>>the doctor cuts his finger'''''' he comes outside crying n sits in a chair n cries.............]]]]]] the person near him asks him why is he cryin...he says i came 4 my blood test the doctor cut my finger.the person next to him cried aloud......the person asked y r u cryin>>>>>>>>>>i came her 4 my urine test ..........????????lol

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a Mexican and a bench is a bench.

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What did the cake say to the icing? Come here

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Is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting AIDS.

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How Many polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, one person is capable of screwing in a light bulb. Unless they were mentally challenged, in which case, they would get someone else to do it for them.

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Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

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Why did the man tell the child to get into the van? They were late for a field trip.

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stuarts mum

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Q: Why did the black man fall off of the cliff? A: He was the victim of a hate crime and his body had to be dumped somewhere

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NASCAR

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What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

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A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

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What did john say to dave when his grandfather died ?

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Yo mama so short, she developed a debilitating neck problem from having to look up at people when talking to them.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A second Holocaust. What's worse than a second Holocaust? Being raped by Santa Claus. What's worse than that? NOTHING.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

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My real life is like my iPad I don't have an iPad.

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What did the man think of when he saw a squadron of military bombers flying over his home? The football game is about to start

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I was driving to Wal-Mart the other day and I saw a black man in a white Murcielago. I thought to myself that he must be doing good. Because everything he owns is white..... dick

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

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i want to watch t.v, how do u turn it on? idk, do u know how? idk either, i cant see or hear then y do u want to watch t.v wuts a tv?

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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