So, there's a lion loose in Colchester. Should've gone to Specsavers... [L]

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What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

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roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have cancer Nutella on muffin

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Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

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What happened when an FBI agent and a cop argued over control of a hostage situation? Several people including a respected community leader were killed.

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

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ok guys finish this joke: Im the biggest fag-got because_____________.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A pile of dead nuns.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's white and sticky? A stick painted white.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

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Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

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Knock knock whos there? I have no anus

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Where was little Sara when the bomb went off? Everywhere. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" Sara's hands

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What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

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What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gun store to buy a gun. After years of abuse and mockery, he was tired of being called "chicken", and was going to shoot up the entire school

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops