Why did Billy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

whitney housten was supposed to sing at my funeral... but i dont think thats gonna happen. ;(

Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the boy fall off of his bike? He was hit by falling koalas.

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

Two peanuts were walking down the street. Well actually, they just rolled a bit and then stopped. Peanuts don't have legs.

What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

What happened when the Asain woman got in her car? A speeding drunk driver hit her and now she is paralyzed from the neck down.. Its a tragic story

Why did the squirrel fall out of a tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of a tree? It was cruelly stapled to the first one.

What did the elephant say to the zebra? Nothing, elephants can't talk.

What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

Why did Ant Man die? He was shot by a gangster, duh.

Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

Q: Why did the black man win the 100 meter dash? A: Because ever since he heard of this event, he has spent weeks preparing for it.

Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

a jewish guy walks in to a bar says to the bartender says "I have aids" and the jewish man replys "my bad"

Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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