Yeah, me too. The car just ran straight through the stoplight and it was all over...

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Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally!

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What do you get when do you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence.

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What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into a worm and finding an apple in it.

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How do you blind an Asian? Rip out his eyeballs.

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Tough crowd tonight...

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One girl said to her friends, "LOL guys wait for me." She ran to a pile of corpses. The girl was about to lose her sanity as she was in denial when her friends had died. She held hands of two of the corpses and smiled and pretended everything was ok.

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What's the difference between Wolfjob and a Jew? Wolfjob is attractive.

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What is the difference between John and John Nothing

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Roses are red Violets are FUCKING VIOLET NOT FUCKING BLUE

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Why did Lisa spill her drink? Her plane crashed.

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Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

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What she says: “You’re really sweet, but I have a boyfriend.” What she means: “You’re really sweet, but I definitely don’t want to date you.”

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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Why does Miley Cyrus make sex tapes It's the only acting job she can get

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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denisssssssssssssss

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Why are Chinese people short? Chinese people are often exposed to harmful chemicals because of lax environmental laws, and suffer from poor nutrition.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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