There was an elephant , a bird, a man, a tree, a cat, a dog, a lion, a horse, a cow, a pig, a duck, a lemon, a turnip, an apple, a rabbit, a slice of pizza and a spoon. I just wasted around 8 seconds of your life

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I have sexdaily. Sorry I mean dyslexia.

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What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

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Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

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What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get down.

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Why did Bob wear a jumper and trousers even though it was a very hot day? Because he is an idiot.

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What makes a subaru a subaru? The fag thats driving it

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play including his 6 year old sister who has down syndrome.

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What's worse than rain on your wedding day? You scheduling your wedding to be held on an aircraft carrier on december 7th 1941.

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What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead

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Godzilla steps on a bar and orders a Scotch.

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This is a joke...that your supposed to laugh at.

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What did the cat say to the cat? Miau

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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How much wood could a Woodchuck chuck if a Woodchuck could chuck wood? The etymology of the name woodchuck is unrelated to wood or chucking

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A horse enter a bar, and the barman says: "why the long face?" The horse has cancer

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what did your mom say when she did crack? i am so f***ed up its not even funny, i mean, i literally screwed the racoon in our back yard. i certainly remember a lot of drugs and alcohol. i am pretty sure i raped your friend, billy. I also went all lezbo on your girlfriend. i murdered your brother. he was telling me to stop, so i lit him on fire and made him eat cigarettes. the very abusive mother was then charged with murder, rape, possesion of illegal drugs, assault and several other charges involving that one crazy night. refrigerator.

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*Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter* Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"

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ADAM FANTUZZI SUCKS KIRANS BALL SACK

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Three jews walked into a bar I lied, it was a gas chamber

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800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

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Wihat's red, green, and goes 100 miles an hour? A frog in a blender!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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