hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

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Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

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What do you get when you a bunch of women and men with a high sex drive? A group of men and women with a high sex drive.

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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what's funnier than a dead baby in a clown costume? philanthropy

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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I hope you take your own wise words to heart Nero, how would you like to claim to be me and get our ship somewhat on land before it all goes to pieces? After all I have been claiming to be you for a long long time.

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penis

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

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Whats the difference between a chicken? One of its legs are both the same.

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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