Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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A man rubs a magic lamp nothing happens

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What do you call a horse with no eyes? A horse with no eyes.

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why do black people like to play basketball steal shoot and run

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your mommy so gehto shes black

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How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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You.

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What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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Q:What do you call a black man on the moon? A:A problem. Q:What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A:A problem. Q:What do you call the entire race of black people on the moon? A:A problem solved

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops