I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A terrorist. What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. What are you racist or something?

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? Almost everything. Infant mortality rates are incrediby high in many third world countries, and it is certainly no laughing matter.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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Why did the bus driver lose his family in a car accident? Bc the little boy was seeking revenge

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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OMG YOU BOUGHT ME FLOWERS THANK YOU

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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How did th-A fridge.

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Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

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Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What do you call a fish without an eye? Impaired of vision.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo, time to go to Auschwitz.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why couldn't the dumbass go to colledge? He couldn't open the door.

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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How do you kill an already dead man? You don't he's already dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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