I hope you shut the others down before you called me by my name, otherwise this will convo will get fairly short.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

A man walked into doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

What's worse than getting struck by lightning? Getting struck while your in your house!!

your mom is so ugly when she entered an ugly contest they said... ok

roy g biv

A white man, a black man, and a Hispanic man are in car, who is driving? The black man, it's his car.

whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

what is the world worst joke? this one

so a black guy goes to a hot dog eating contest how many does he eat? enough to win.

Your mama sucks so much dick, it's not funny.

Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

What do you call an African-American, Latino, Asian, and Canadian all on the same football team? A reasonably diverse group of teammates who are most likely good acquaintances.

What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

why did the woman commit suicide? because 2+2=4

Yesterday I was walking my dog and while I was walking my dog, guess what happened? It got hit by a bus.

Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

How did sarah break her arm? She was in a tragic car accident. An ambulance arrived and quickly rushed her to the hospital where she was cared for by medical professionals.

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How many cavemen does it take to change a lightbulb? A caveman wouldn't know what to do with a lightbulb.

A man is talking with his friend when suddenly he picks up a banana. He starts talking with the banana, and after a while of conversing the man sadly puts down his banana and says to his friend, "I'm sorry but your son has just died in a horrible accident."

What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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