Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

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Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

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What's black and has a beary taste? A black bear.

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Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

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What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

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Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

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Why did the boy cry? His Parents died.

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Why did the man give money to a drug dealer? He lost a bet.

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what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

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Holocaust jokes suck. Anne frankley, I won't stand for them

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What happened to the boy who survived a tragic car accident?? He stepped out of the car and got hit by a semi.

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reggin... its N I GG E R backwards

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A police man pulls over a blonde for speeding. The policeman tells her she was speeding and starts to write a ticket. She get emotional and begins to cry. He writes the ticket, she signs it, and she drives off.

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Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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What did the teacher say to the boy whose dog had just died? Haha, your dog just died.

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An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

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What did Dr. Pepper say to Sprite? I'm a Doctor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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