Why was 2 afraid of 81? Because seven eight nine.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. I ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats the difference between a fish and whale? Ones bigger than the other.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why are you looking here? The joke's in your hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Bob and his family were looking forward to going to an all inclusive holiday to Spain. When they got on the plane, a bomb went off, causing Bob to realise that he was never going to see his family again, and that they were about to suffer a horrific, painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the man say to the other man? Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q:what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? other person: What? A:how am i suppose to know I'm not a lawyer.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

3 blind mice walk into a bar. they have no idea of their surroundings and are quickly crushed to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What time is it when an elephant steps on your watch? Time to go to the hospital and get treated for a shattered wrist.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you get when you hit a kid with a hockeystick? arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's wanted by none, wanted by one, and is worse than Terran Hansen? Brooke Colbert. Go you Jesse.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops