Why do blacks run away from whites? Because god told all people to never go to the light.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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i am not a pothead!!! the only time ive evr been high was springbreak last year!!! mm hmm... wat were u doin over spring break to get high? i had jaw surgery and the doctor had me on tons of painkillers

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a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

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Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

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Whats worse then Justin Bieber? It's a trick question, there's is nothing worse than her

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A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

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What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

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How do you change your dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

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what did the child say to his mother? daddy raped me!

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Want to hear a joke? Me too.

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What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

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Why was the woman crying? Because I hit her with a bat.

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...The new series of spinoff movies from the worlds most frightening franchise! Pretty Normal Activity: Doing the groceries *****-Did not scare me at all :D! Ballbusters movie rentals *****- The demon never showed up which made this the scariest movie ever! Could not sleep for months... Whatyumean there is nothing paranormal in this? Aww FU*beep*CK!! Sumgay Inthestreet Journal *****-Pissed myself just from hearing the title got a stroke and almost died!, was it another Paranormal movie you said? Most overhyped comment we could find. Goddamn exaggerated movie reviews that fooled me into buying the original and expect something actually scary :(

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What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What's the difference between your mother and a prostitute? Nothing.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

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A student often slept through his alarm, which led to a lower class attendance rate and thus a poor performance on his exam

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

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A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

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Why did the kid have a toy truck? because he bought it

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You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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