Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

thumb_up thumb_down -62

How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

thumb_up thumb_down +41

why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The joke above me is a wind-up, losers :P

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? People leading healthy, active lives physically and socially.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

thumb_up thumb_down -11

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops