How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -72

Eating chicken off a baby's ass

thumb_up thumb_down -76

You know whats funny? Things that aren't listed here.

thumb_up thumb_down -110

What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -120

someone called a frog a frog

thumb_up thumb_down +127

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +115

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

thumb_up thumb_down +35

your mommy so gehto shes black

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why was the woman in the kitchen? She was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Where do bananas come from? Mexico

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I hope you take your own wise words to heart Nero, how would you like to claim to be me and get our ship somewhat on land before it all goes to pieces? After all I have been claiming to be you for a long long time.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he lives in a chicken coop and has never even seen a road.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

How much stuff would a stuff muff huff if a stuff muff could huff stuff? Whole dang lotsa

thumb_up thumb_down -61

What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

thumb_up thumb_down -101

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops