Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

When life gets you down, make a comforter.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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