When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

What do you call a guy who has sex with kids? A child molester

Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

What?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

An Asian, Burnett, and a Blond are stranded on an island. They all say, "What the crap?! How'd I get on this island?!"

What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

a blind man walks into a bar it hurt.

Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Lean a ladder against the tree and reassure them if they are apprehensive.

Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

Why did the girl drown? Well, the girl probably did drown because she was within the ages of 3-5 years old, and she probably had a physical incapapbilty and she could not swim so her parents didn't save her.

Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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